ASYLUM - For all mankind

Our friends at FilmDrunk are reporting that Universal Studios has green-lit "Fast Five," which would be the fifth installment in the "Fast and the Furious" franchise.

Wow. That's a lot of burning rubber. "The Cannonball Run" was only allowed one real sequel, despite a cast that included Burt Reynolds, Terry Bradshaw, Jackie Chan and a monkey.

Does this mean "The Fast and the Furious" ranks among the best car movies of all time? Hardly. But it certainly adds credence to our theory that Paul Walker has pictures of Universal executives in very compromising positions.

Of course, there have been a ton of great car movies produced over the years. We've listed a few, but realize we are only scratching (keying?) the surface.

Do you rate American Graffiti? Ronin and it's awesome chase? Gone in 60 Seconds? A classic like Bullitt? Or something else?

Sure, you say. What's the big news about this? Such items are noteworthy because the scissors we refer to were left behind in someone's stomach. For two years. Oh yes, we don't make this stuff up!

And the patient spent two years bearing the pain before deciding to see a doctor. Thankfully, he did finally see one. And after a three-hour operation, got the scissors removed. Not sure yet how the scissors are doing, but the man is said to be doing fine!

It's amazing how people move around with stuff inside them that they don't realize. One would think that with all the acids and bile and whatnot in your tummy, the scissors would have corroded and caused further trouble, but apparently not!

Well, that's one point of pain out of his body. And he got a pair of scissors to show for it!

Progress, they say, is what we are undergoing. But are we? With the government intent on banning anything that remotely threatens to "affect the moral fibre of the country", that seems like a far-fetched promise.

Take Savita Bhabhi, for instance. The voluptuous lady who is better known for her sex-escapades than for being the typical demure housewife that TV shows would have us idolize. It helps to remember that she is a cartoon character, a figment of someone's imagination. And perhaps experiences!

So when the Indian government decided to ban her, she became famous. That's the way the world works. And then, she became a bigger phenomenon than ever. So the government has now un-banned her! And so everyone is scurrying to see what the fuss was all about!

And film-makers and ad people seem happiest! And we're sure so are "connoisseurs of erotica" in India. In other words, porn lovers! Welcome back, Bhabhi-ji!

Did you know interest rates remained unchanged yesterday? We'd missed that breaking news story yesterday, but have learned all about it (steady at 3.75%) after watching this spectacular clip from Seven News.

In a live cross to a Macquarie Bank talking head, a cube worker in the background is doing a little of the old Alt-Tab tango.

On one screen, the proverbial spreadsheet cloaking device. On the other, near-naked photos of hotties. He even shows some multitasking prowess by chatting with a colleague while having a browse.

The perfection in this clip is when he looks over his shoulder at the final moment, realising all too late that he just might have been caught on camera.

Watch and learn, bank workers. Remember, this could have been any one of you!

Ah, the Maharaja. The symbol of India's might in the skies. The politeness and humility personified by the red-uniformed-namaste-wishing-man. Alas, he wasn't so polite or hospitable to one Ustad Amjad Ali Khan recently.

Story goes that the sarod maestro was traveling from Ahmedabad to Mumbai for a concert at the Fine Arts Society. He checked in his sarod, a companion of 25 years, no less. We can imagine how well it must've been tuned... But when he collected the instrument upon landing in Mumbai, it was a shattering experience. For his sarod was shattered.

An emotional Ustad blamed some porter, but he also added that he could perhaps never come to terms with the loss. And it is a total writeoff since the one person who fixed Ustad's sarods till now also passed away recently.

However, the thorough gentleman that he is, Mr Khan clarified that he did not intend to take any action against the airline. He just appealed the national carrier to take better care of musicians saying, "Had it been any other international airline, I would have sued it. But the damage has been done by our national carrier and I want to appeal to the officials to at least learn to take care of musicians like us."

Right. So we think that takes care of musicians. Anyone care to stand up for the common man? No? Oh, well. We'll continue to live with lost luggage and stolen items.

Nothing can be more terrifying for a doctor than seeing the dead corpse he is about to cut open for an autopsy wake up and say "Hello!" And that's exactly what happened to the doctors from a local hospital in the Jajpur district of Orissa.

Manas Deo, a native, was rushed to the hospital after a vehicle hit him near Baragadia village in Jajpur. The accident left him critically injured and when he was examined at the hospital, the doctor on duty declared him dead. So when the doctors in charge of autopsy started conducting Deo's post-mortem examination they were in for a nasty surprise. Just as they started the examination, Deo woke up and scared the poor guys to death.

After the weird incident, Deo was transferred to a hospital in Cuttack to undergo further treatment.

We wonder who was wronged here. The doctors or poor Deo. Incidentally, in some Indian languages, Deo means God. We wonder if he thinks so of himself now...

Our happy hour fact to amaze your drinking buddies with.

The human brain is only capable of maintaining 150 stable relationships.

In 1992, British anthropologist Robin Dunbar came up with 150, which was dubbed "Dunbar's Number," after studying social groupings throughout history. Now, with sites like Facebook pushing the number of declared friendships claimed by enthusiastic social media consumers into the thousands, Dunbar wanted to retest his formulation.

Defining "friends" as those you contact at least once a year, the Oxford professor analyzed Facebook traffic. "The interesting thing is that you can have 1,500 friends but when you actually look at traffic on sites, you see people maintain the same inner circle of around 150 people that we observe in the real world," Dunbar says.

We're glad he cleared that up, because it made us dizzy to think that some of our friends were juggling 1,327 other friendships. Now if someone could explain the mystery of the "poke" function ...